Stories that demand to be told | #1
Ten plus two excellent essays by writers from the Ochre Sky Universe
Welcome to Ochre Sky Stories, a home for writers from Ochre Sky Workshops.
This is the first edition of Stories that demand to be told, a curated spread of the most evocative, resonant, real stories.
1. Keep it up! by
Every time I received the letters, I always imagined looking at him through an oval-shaped glass window of the ICU ward at the CMCH. I, propped up by someone so that I could get a good look, and he, attached to tubes and monitors but awake and smiling and nodding at me.
The light on my side of the door was a warm yellow and on his side white light. I imagine I was in something yellow, and he was in the hospital white and green (or was it blue?). His smile is all I could see while reading the letters.
2. Eating Together by
Before we start, we offer a spoonful of food from our own lunchboxes and accept a spoonful of food from everyone else's. When I was still new, one of the co-founders was eager to have a bite of my khichdi but I had already started eating and the food had become ‘jhoota’ now. ‘Are you worried it is enjalu-fied?’, she laughed and went ahead and took a bite. ‘I have never tasted food from your lunchbox’, she said and then asked me about my cooking process.
B R Ambedkar called it inter-dining.
3. Channeling Emotions into a Safe Place - interviewed by
How did motherhood change your creative practice?
Motherhood is the force that drives my personal essays. Through my writing, I’m tediously building this bridge for my children so they can find their way to me - someday when they themselves feel lost, when their arrogant youth will make way for their soul-searching adulthood. Writing is the home I imagine that will eventually connect us all through our shared stories.
4. Does it 'look difficult' or should I just say 'no'? by
Today I am giving myself the space to breathe and someday, I will also try “that word that cannot be said”, whose cousin I use so often when I say, ‘it looks difficult’.
Dil mein ek leher sii uthi hai abhi….
How exhilarating might it be to just say – “no”, without launching into long explanations and mummifying it in layers of polite-ism. Someday I will also give myself the permission to exit some family whatsapp groups.
5. The Dress I Left Behind by
My body viscerally reacts when I hear the chant, when I watch the bows of obedience and the glazed eyes of adulation. A sea of orange. Every nerve ending is frayed and I’m waiting for them to unleash a fresh bout of violence in physical or verbal form. I’m clenched in anticipation for unpleasantness. I hate these men in orange peddling ‘Hinduisms’.
6. Rightful Place by
But if there’s one thing the kids enjoy more than hiding under tables, it’s hiding under tables with their dog. Sometimes after the girls squeezed into her spot, she would come running to me and place her chin on my knee, looking up desperately as if to say, “What the fuck have you done? Who are these random children and why are they in our house?”
7. A List of All The Things I've Forgotten, That I'd Like to Write About by
I've re-enrolled in the Ochre Sky Stories memoir writing workshop, that the very cool and radiant Natasha Badhwar and Raju Tai curate for intimate groups several times a year. Writing for me is sometimes emotionally strenuous but almost always rewarding. I find that there's a certain inner game to writing a thing — you have to get over yourself and be alive to the world. Neither of these comes easy.
8. A mad woman’s forgiveness by
Women have it tough and many like us respond to it by hardening a little and acting out in ways we are not always acutely aware of. These days I always feel a surge of compassion for hurt women, who hurt others. It has become easier to let go of my own righteous hurt. My forgiveness for one is also my apology to another. When I learn to forgive Mrs P, I reach out to forgive myself too.
9. waiting by
There was a period in my life where anything would set me off and there go the waterworks, no controlling it and no stopping them from flowing. These are all the magical things that come with a confusing romantic relationship and with living away from home; feeling so alien in your own body that there is no option but to attack it and then feel incredibly guilty to pounce upon the one thing that keeps you alive.
10. Sea, within and beyond by
It is been 6 years since I laid out my heart over text to an almost lover-almost friend, too scared to say it out loud, too scared to let the dust of the words settle in my being - “I don’t hear the waves anymore”.
The grief bent me – untethered, carrying the weight of unbelonging, I hobbled through days and cried through nights. Admission of this intangible loss meant that I couldn’t pretend anymore; I couldn’t go on betraying myself; I needed to find a way back home to myself. Back then, all I wanted was to retrace my path through daysweeksmonthsyears, find that exact beat of moment where the sea within me went quiet.
11. 5 roundabout ways to make your marriage work by
I wanted to hang out with this guy. I wanted to travel and pause on sidewalks sampling street food and seasonal fruits. I wanted to receive him at railway-stations and text him from faraway places. I wanted both of us to heal from the mishaps of our childhood. Together and separately.
I also wanted to find a way to be an effective adult in this culture, society and country that we had in common. And live in peace with this person whose presence often brought out versions of me that I liked being.
12. My Whacky Weight Loss Method by
Shoulds obstruct the flow of blood to my brain. If I could lose their weight, I'd feel lighter, whether or not the scale reflects it.
I look around and see those of us who were pressurised as kids. To cope, we lie, rebel without cause, seek thrill & hedonism just to get a break from our inner monsters who nag us constantly. With all this pressure, I eat in ‘flight’ mode and sit in ‘freeze’ mode. I eat to feed the void inside me, administering an ongoing anaesthesia.
Write with us, Natasha Badhwar and Raju Tai in Ochre Sky Stories Memoir Workshop.
REGISTER here: https://tinyurl.com/OchreSkyWriting
thank you for the mention <3 in the best company
What an amazing idea Natasha and Raju! So fabulous and so thrilled to be here.